[ everything that bucky used to be afraid of, before, how steve threw himself into fights and kept getting back up when it would've been smarter to stay down, how he'd shrug off asthma attacks and conveniently forget to tell Bucky that he'd stayed home from work because he'd been too dizzy or weak to get down their building stairs. He'd clung to life like a barnacle, tiny and stubborn, and then he'd gotten big and stubborn, taking on tanks and bullets and entire hydra bases wearing a bullseye on his chest. He used to care. Maybe he didn't know exactly what God had intended for the serum, but he'd cared enough to stand his ground and defend himself over Bucky being sore about it.
Of all things, apparently surviving was the pressure that had finally worn him down. This Steve drifts like there's nothing anchoring him to reality, forgets to smile, apparently has forgotten that it's a goddamned miracle that he didn't die in the same TB ward as his mom, coughing his lungs into nothing.
he grips the back of steve's head, his voice raw and cracked. ]
I barely recognize you, Stevie. What the hell happened?
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[ everything that bucky used to be afraid of, before, how steve threw himself into fights and kept getting back up when it would've been smarter to stay down, how he'd shrug off asthma attacks and conveniently forget to tell Bucky that he'd stayed home from work because he'd been too dizzy or weak to get down their building stairs. He'd clung to life like a barnacle, tiny and stubborn, and then he'd gotten big and stubborn, taking on tanks and bullets and entire hydra bases wearing a bullseye on his chest. He used to care. Maybe he didn't know exactly what God had intended for the serum, but he'd cared enough to stand his ground and defend himself over Bucky being sore about it.
Of all things, apparently surviving was the pressure that had finally worn him down. This Steve drifts like there's nothing anchoring him to reality, forgets to smile, apparently has forgotten that it's a goddamned miracle that he didn't die in the same TB ward as his mom, coughing his lungs into nothing.
he grips the back of steve's head, his voice raw and cracked. ]
I barely recognize you, Stevie. What the hell happened?